This is my sixth year playing fantasy football. It’s getting out of contol. This year, I’m in four fantasy football leagues. I’m hooked, and I might need help.
For those of you unfamiliar with the term “fantasy football,” it’s time to get familiar. If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to be in charge of a team of superstars, or ever yearned for a new outlet to talk trash, fantasy football is for you.
It’s pretty simple actually. You assemble a team of players, and earn points based on their performance each week. Your team is comprised of a quarterback, two running backs, three wide receivers, a tight end, a kicker, and a defense. Have your team earn enough points every week and you’re getting paid at the end of the season.
Fantasy football is flat-out blowing up. A few years ago you couldn’t find many websites running fantasy leagues. This year, there are enough fantasy-related sites to take up every line in this column. Just take the ridiculousness of NFL.com, for example. For $9.95 a month, you can watch exclusive highlights of your fantasy football team. Sundays at 10:30 a.m., you can tune into the Ultimate Fantasy Football Show on Fox Sports Net to get advice on your fantasy squad. Even ESPN Motion airs fantasy tidbits a few times a week offering injury updates and matchups to take advantage of.
For all of you fantasy football ballers out there, help me out and answer these questions with me to decide if we are really hooked in fantasy land:
Do I fall asleep every night and wake up every morning to the same question echoing in my head: Why didn’t I draft Priest Holmes? Yes-but it’s OK.
Do I go to a sports bar every Sunday to watch my fantasy football players in action? Yes-and it makes my week.
Do I remind my friends every minute of every day that my team is in first place in the league? You’re damn right.
If I happen to have a fantasy player starting against my hometown football team, do I root for them when they play well? Absolutely not. What are you, Canadian?
Did I run to my computer to pick up Rams running back Lamar Gordon when Marshall Faulk gimped off the field with a broken hand? Faulk owners, say it with me, “Yes.”
Do I consider myself fortunate for having the opportunity to participate in the same fantasy league with the same friends for the next twenty years of my life? Absolutely.
So is there an end in sight? There’s fantasy football, baseball, hockey, basketball, NASCAR, golf and many, many more. When is all the fantasy gonna stop? Is fantasy life the next step?
“Hey Paul, I’m going to the Tombs for a drink, you wanna come?”
“No you’re not, I drafted you and you’re not starting this week. Get back on the bench!”
“OK freak.”
