I hate the Cowboys. Pretty much everybody does. Even my Texan roommates hate them. With that said, I didn’t mind all that much when Terrell Owens did a little jig in the middle of the Dallas star after scoring a touchdown. And I was mildly amused when he whipped out the sharpie.
As for “towelgate,” I was actually more annoyed with the response than the commercial itself. I’m tired of all of these people who see themselves on a crusade to protect the sanctity of Monday night football. No one has a problem with the fact that there are probably more shots of old guys with erectile dysfunction than of players with athletic function.
And yet, despite such an illustrious and celebrated career of stupidity, T.O. may have found a way to top himself yet again. That’s right, baby, he’s goin’ to the Super Bowl! So what if his doctors haven’t cleared him, right? Like the man says, he’s progressed a lot faster than his doctors thought that he would. While pessimistic doctors said that he’d barely manage a crawl, Terrell Owens has bravely triumphed with a masterful hobble. So what if the most rigorous part of his physical therapy to date has been jogging in the pool? Maybe it’ll rain a lot in Jacksonville before the big game. Let’s face it, those puddles can get nasty.
Let’s not forget, Terrell Owens has God on his side. There’s nothing like invoking the name of God to explain why He cares so very much about the outcome of the Super Bowl, let alone the physical health of one arrogant wide receiver. Owens stated that there was no contending with his doctor, the “man upstairs.” Yes, God, Terrell is here for his 10:30 appointment. Don’t worry, I pushed your meeting on the situation in Darfur back to tomorrow. If I were Owens, the only man upstairs I would care about would be Bill Belichick.
Let’s face it: this New England team has been incredible this season and will establish itself as a legitimate dynasty when it wins the Super Bowl on February 6. Had Pittsburgh not made any mistakes on the field, they might have had a chance of beating New England. The same goes for Philadelphia, whose biggest mistake may come before kickoff. The parents cannot afford to give into their spoiled brat’s selfish demands. If Owens goes out there in his decidedly gimpy state, he will be a liability. In a game as important like this and, by all indications, as difficult as this, the Eagles cannot let Owens’ ego drag them down.
