No matter the diversity of interests at Georgetown, everybody from the athlete to the student guard to the poor soul in Lau at 3 in the morning has at least one thing in common: we’re all really, really tired. And although this is entirely valid, the response should not be to “take naps.” I don’t even like the term “to take a nap.” I prefer “time pilfering” or “daylight pillaging.” Such dark practices are evil and we should all strive to do them as little as possible.
Now, when I say this, your reaction is probably one of serious doubt, and I can understand why. The supposed point of naps is to recoup sleep not gained overnight, and if so then that’s fine; you’ve essentially traded an hour then for an hour now. If, however, you’re napping because you’re “tired” even though you’ve gotten enough sleep, then I’m sorry to inform you that science has rendered your problem invalid.
See, what people say when they nap is “I need a rest” when what they mean to say is “I need energy.” And although your body’s natural response to a need for energy is to make you drowsy, you’re smarter than your cerebellum! Drink some coffee for the caffeine, take a jog for the epinephrine, watch a scary youtube clip to get your heart racing; all of these things are chemical ways to cheat and buy yourself time. And to be clear, that is what you’re buying: time, the one thing you can never get back. Even if medical science can extend your life, time in your youth is more valuable than time in your old age because your energy levels allow you to be more productive with it.
I’d like you, the reader, to please think about all the things you’d like to do. Ignoring any work you can get done- and to be clear, you could get a lot of work done- but imagine all the enjoyment you could have in your life with an hour and a half extra every day. All of that reading for pleasure you used to do in high school could be a reality again, or, if you’re anything like me, you could invest yet more time into your Steam account. You deserve a mental health break that isn’t biologically obligated.
It’s important to realize that excess daytime sleep, comfy though it may be, is absolutely a choice. If a cup of coffee buys you the same energy as a hour-long nap, then the decision to nap is a decision that you’d rather not have cognizance and fine motor control for the next hour. And to those of you who admit the choice but still prefer to indiscriminately murder the sunlit hours, don’t brag about how great a nap you had. I enjoy all the time I spend playing FIFA but that doesn’t make it time well spent.
This should not be construed as an argument against sleep generally; at least, not yet. For now, sleep is a biological necessity. The instant it isn’t anymore, I’m changing my personal motto from “carpe diem” to “carpe diem et noctem.” But at least as of today, medical science has yet to find a way to eliminate the need for sleep and you should get between 7.5 and 9 hours of sleep a night. My point is that anything more than that is just wasteful. What’s more, not taking that 2PM nap will actually allow you to get more sleep that night: the work you can do in that extra daytime hour will let you go to bed an hour earlier.
The most frequent argument I hear against this philosophy is one of doubt and concern, mostly under the impression that even moderate use of artificial stimulants is bad for you. This is nothing short of Neo-Luddism, and denies the reality of modern science and chemical engineering. Science may not yet have solved the problem of sleep, but it has at least allowed us to ignore it in the short term and push through when we need to. Delay your nap until it’s bedtime and you’ll get another full REM cycle.
Georgetown students are busy enough; there’s no need to throw your excess time in the garbage. That we must waste any time sleeping is tragic enough, but try treating your wasted time as you do your actual trash and do your best to reduce, reuse, recycle. Kill the nap, save your day.
