The American Airlines crash in Rockaway, Queens is terrible because it killed hundreds of innocent people. The attacks on the World Trade Center are terrible because they killed thousands of people and threatened the safety and security of all Americans. Which is worse?
The answer is that they are different; one is not the “better” tragedy. Yet my first reaction to the crash on Nov. 12 was one of relief more than sadness at the death of so many innocent people. I kept saying to myself, “I hope this isn’t terrorism.” Living in western Queens, I was immediately scared for my family and friends when I heard about the crash. I knew nobody in my family was flying that day, but my concern was that New York was under siege again and my family was at risk. I live 15 minutes from LaGuardia Airport. What if another plane goes down? What if my neighborhood is attacked? I emotionally reacted to the events, but as I learned more, I was comforted by the knowledge that my loved ones were not in jeopardy.
Many people had similar emotional responses. One friend of mine remarked that “planes crash all the time,” and another asked, “Well, what do you expect from American Airlines?” These responses, like my own, are not appropriate, though they seem almost acceptable and understandable in light of Sept. 11 tragedy from which we are all still recovering. The entire nation recoiled in horror at the Monday morning crash, many of us jumping to conclusions about our new airline safety measures and the effectiveness of our “war on terrorism.” However, this defensive reaction to the crash made me realize just how different my world is today than it was two months ago. It is the little differences in myself that show me that the terrorism has not just changed the skyline but has altered my instincts. Rather than mourn the loss of life, I prayed that the lives of my loved ones would be protected.
My reaction to these events saddens and disturbs me, especially when I recall how upset I was after the crash of TWA Flight 800 almost five years ago, in the summer of 1996. This plane crash was also accompanied by speculation about possible terrorist involvement, yet the media focus on the day of the crash was where it should be?on the victims. There were outpourings of sympathy to the families of victims and long, protracted hunts for possible survivors. In stark contrast, the media coverage on Nov. 12 was curt and reflective of the general mood among many Americans. All on board are dead, but not from terrorism. I, like many, focused on what this event was not, instead of that it was?a genuine tragedy that will have a profound impact on too many people.
The events of Sept. 11 have taken away from Americans not just our feelings of safety but also some of our emotional reactions to genuinely tragic events. The attacks exposed Americans to visions of horror that are unlike anything many of us have ever seen in our lifetime. As a result, the events of Nov. 12 are comparatively less shocking and more palatable. I was shocked by the images of burning residential homes in Rockaway, but not as much as I was sickened by the sight of people jumping from the crumbling Twin Towers. The death toll in Queens was high, but not as high as it could have been. A mechanical failure is a tragedy, but a terrorist plot would have been much worse. War and terrorism pervert our understanding of what is normal and real, and limit our emotional sensitivity. We all want to do something to reclaim our lives in light of Sept. 11. Let’s start by getting sad again. Many people have died in Queens, and our nation should be mourning, not breathing a sigh of relief.