A small girl stands in her backyard with a bottle filled with soapy bubble fluid in her hand. She pulls the small plastic wand from the bottle, breathes in and blows out slowly, forcing the bubble fluid out of the wand and allowing a perfectly spherical bubble to escape. At the same time, that girl’s brother blows on a dandelion and a snow-white seed flies off and lands on that bubble. The Georgetown Hoyas men’s basketball team are the seed on that bubble.
Yes, with the NCAA Tournament quickly approaching, the Hoyas find themselves in a very precarious position, on the bubble and uncertain if they will make the Big Dance. How did this horrible event come about? Well, someone has to take the fall for the Hoyas’ four-overtime loss to Notre Dame last Saturday. We admit that it was a great game and that the overtimes added suspense, but didn’t it strike anyone else as strange that the player who was having one of the best games in Big East history, Michael Sweetney, never got a sniff of the ball at the end of regulation or any of the first three overtimes? After pondering this gross injustice we decided that Kevin Braswell deserves most of our ire. He’s the senior point guard on a young, but still very talented team and it’s his job to get the ball to the players who will win the game. Although things look bleak, the season still can be salvaged if we win four of the last five. If we do, Braswell will have to be the one to leads us there.
Of course we’d much rather be in our position than in the Tampa Bay Buccaneers’ shoes’. Firing one of the best coaches in the business in Tony Dungy, lampooned by the Tuna, spurned by “Just Win Baby” Al Davis in their fruitless quest for Jon Gruden, rejecting an extremely qualified candidate in Marvin Lewis and now laughed at by every major college coach in the country. We think that the time has come for the Bucs to go the whole way back to their football purgatory of the mid-`80s and bring back Vinny Testaverde. This way when the Bucs lose all their games, brats like Keyshawn Johnson and Warren Sapp will have someone to blame other than themselves.
And finally, after blasting the Winter Olympics last week we finally found a reason to watch: hot figure skaters. To be honest, that Jaime Sale has triple-Salchowed her way into our hearts. She has everything going for her: hitting unsuspecting Russian skaters from behind, dominating performances, a compelling injustice and a hilarious performance on Leno. We can’t wait until she does the next Enrique Iglesias video, or at least until the suggestively named Russian Irina Slutskaya or the foxy Michelle Kwan take the ice. Damn.
