Haute Mess: Get Frankenfabulous

Whether you forgot to order your Halloween costume on Amazon or your group costume fell through, have no fear —Julian and Neha are here.

Because Halloween falls awkwardly on a Wednesday this year, you have the grand opportunity to dress to impress two weekends in a row. Even if you missed out this past weekend, here are some creative costumes you can pull together from your wardrobe.

Richard Simmons – Want to rock an ‘80s exercise diva getup? Perfect for a guy or girl, just throw on some spandex or running shorts and a sports bra or undershirt, paired with your gym sneakers (the only time we condone the use of athletic footwear). Maybe borrow your roommate’s portable speakers, and transform the party into an ‘80s jazzercise routine.

If you want to make this a group costume, grab two of your friends and have them be your workout biddies. For your hair, tease, tease, tease to keep that ‘80s pouf going with tons of hairspray. And don’t skimp on the metallic accents, which means if you have any raver clothes, do not be afraid to whip them out.

Royalty – Looking to get to the ball by midnight, but without a costume? From ancient Cleopatra to the iconic Disney Princess, you can pull together a regal look without breaking the bank.

Glitz and glamour are all you need to execute the classic princess outfit. Big gold bangles and necklaces will add pizazz to a simple white dress. Even if you don’t have a white dress, take a sheet and wrap toga-style. For a quick and easy headpiece, use either yarn or lanyard and braid a strand to tie around your long and luscious tresses.

For the Disney look, pick your childhood favorite and play dress up! Take Snow White for instance—pair a big, bright, A-line skirt with a blue blouse, perhaps even peplum, and fasten your hair with a red bow that you can make out of ribbon. But before you walk out the door, be sure to grab your seven dwarfs.

And now, for some punny costumes.

Take a cardboard box, open and pull over your head, and adorn with flattened cereal boxes. Add some fake blood to the boxes with lipstick or ketchup and carry around a knife (preferably fake) to scare all your party hosts into letting you in—you’re a cereal killer.

Here’s one with no specific clothing required; just get a basket and fill it with eggs, and call yourself an “egg donor.” While at the party put on your biggest smile and offer a fellow Hoya your egg donating services—ideally while singing Young Humma’s classic, “Fried or Fertilized?”

Fasten a homemade sling/baby carrier using an old sheet or t-shirt, and fill it with a bag of “sugar.” If anyone asks, you’re a sugar daddy.

Height of laziness i.e. 30 seconds or less:

If you just got the Facebook invite to some Halloween shindig and you are sans costume or lacking any incentive to make one, go dressed as your normal self. If anyone asks who you are, reply with confidence that you are an American werewolf in Georgetown. If they ask you why you don’t have hair or fangs, point out with even more confidence that it is not a full moon.

If you want to get somewhat creative, grab red lipliner or lipstick and draw a line down the side of your face and voila! You are the San Andreas Fault.

So go out there with sass and ‘tude, and rock your homemade costume, however long it took you to make. And party like it’s 1999!


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