In Sunday’s historic match-up, Team Ruff and Team Fluff competed for the Lombarky Trophy at the Puppy Bowl XIII. For those who were disappointed in the outcome of the “real” Super Bowl, take comfort in the fact that the Animal Planet showed a bunch of tiny fluff balls running around without a care in the world, and in that time, there was no such thing as “winners” and “losers.”
Those puppies were all over the field, playing deep, running the sidelines, going long in the endzone. There was a lack of focus coming from both teams, and overall the players were mostly doing their own thing, because they’re dogs.
There was a lot of foul play; puppies jumping on other puppies and blindly running into each other. To be honest, it was a mess. But it was a beautiful mess.
The game was dominated by golden retreiver pup Timber, who looked so damn cute in that bandana and was also a bundle of joy. What an adorable lil fluffer. It’s hard to assess his game, since dog sports have no stats, and since no one really knows the rules of the Puppy Bowl except to have fun and forget about the problems in the world.
Both teams performed at a professional level, with all the dogs playing their best and proving the worth of the sport as a whole. Thanks to the expertise of WeRateDogs, the audience was assured that all those puppers were pure and good.
When asked for commentary, the dogs just kept barking.
All-in-all, the Puppy Bowl was a win for those puppers, and a win for America. If there’s one thing that can bring this country together right now, it’s a bunch of dogs running around a fake football field looking cute as heck and knowing absolutely nothing about the current state of this American politics.
