I’m from Texas, where everything is bigger and better, so I’m typically not one to be intimidated by food. But at the recently opened Ray’s Hell Burger, I experienced the foreign feeling of trepidation when my burger arrived.
My meal, the Soul Burger Number One, was a small skyscraper, consisting of two fluffy toasted Brioche buns, a large leaf of romaine lettuce, a thick slice of tomato, three slices of Applewood smoked bacon, grilled rings of red onions, a pile of Cognac and sherry sautéed mushrooms, a half melted slice of Swiss cheese and, sandwiched in between it all, a 10 ounce patty of hand trimmed, freshly ground, premium aged beef.
Needless to say, I was worried about whether my mouth, stomach, or heart could handle it all. But the food quickly disappeared. The meat didn’t have the greasy quality that others do—unlike a meal at Five Guys, I didn’t feel my heart clogging as the meat went down.
The owner of Ray’s, Michael Landrum, has a lot of experience with beef, as the owner of Ray’s the Steaks in Arlington and Ray’s the Classics in Silver Spring. Fortunately for the starving college student, Landrum’s latest effort downgrades atmosphere and price, while living up to his reputation of cooking with quality ingredients. The standard burger topped only with lettuce and tomato is $6.95 and comes with corn and watermelon. All toppings are free, except for bacon, guacamole, and 18 different kinds of cheese, which range from $1 to $5 a slice for everything from Brie to Époisse. But the burgers are jucy enough to stand alone, even without toppings or sauce.
Even when toppings are added, they are carefully cooked so as to not overpower the natural taste of the meat. There are only hints of Cognac and sherry in the mushrooms, and the Swiss cheese isn’t terribly sharp.
While the usual suspects are available in the sauce department (A1, ketchup, and different kinds of mustard), they tend to take over the taste of the burger and should be avoided. Also, ignore the Ray’s Heck Sauce: though it advertises itself as “zesty tangy but not spicy,” it ends up tasting like a weak cucumber salad dressing.
For those too indecisive to choose between Au Poivre, Blackened, Diablo, or Old Fashioned Grilled Burger styles, there are a number of promising pre-matched burger options such as the “Let’s Get It On” (“We are all sensitive burgers, with so much to give…”) or the “B.I.G. Poppa.” They all range from $8 to $10 with the exception of the “Fat Joe” and “The Burger of Seville,” which come with seared foie gras and truffle oil.
Although Ray’s takes its food seriously, it is never pretentious. The restaurant is casual—you order at the counter off of chalkboards and wait for your name to be called while attempting to grab one of the few wood tables. Seats fill up quickly, and when they do, the floor quickly accumulates straw wrappers and stray toppings. While the restaurant offers silverware, very few people use it, choosing to dig in hands first, aided by the roll of paper towels placed at each table.
Although many will mourn the lack of fries, their absence helps keep the Ray’s meal from crossing into the territory of dangerous excess. Instead, the barely buttered ears of corn and two wedges of watermelon add a refreshing crunch that helps cleanse the palate.
Despite its size, Ray’s Hell Burger has been carefully constructed not to inspire guilt or trips to the gym but an appreciation for what a burger can be. Landrum has not just created a new spin on an old American classic but has also created an entire meal where the flavor of the high quality meat is showcased front and center. It is not merely a burger, but instead a steak camouflaged in between buns.
Ray’s Hell Burger is located at 1713 Wilson Blvd, Arlington, VA. Ray’s is open Monday through Friday 5-10 pm, and Saturday and Sunday noon-10 pm.
