My older brother Eric graduated from Bowdoin College, which you’re probably not very familiar with because it’s in Maine. The people who go there have little interest in Model UN or many of the other endeavors that titillate more than a few Georgetown students. With what sort of intellectual extra-currics do they pad their resumes, you may ask? Bowling.
That’s right, bowling. The one where you roll a large heavy ball down a wooden lane toward ten pins with the object of knocking them down. My brother returned home Christmas of freshman year to report to our flabbergasted parents that he had taken up bowling. He’d joined a league, and his team even had uniforms! Both of my parents were more than a little upset about this unexpected hobby. And why shouldn’t they be? Bowling is a sport for silk shirt-wearing, middle-aged, overweight men whose souls have been crushed by a lifetime of working for an American car manufacturer and rooting for the Cleveland Browns. Or is it?
One bright afternoon this summer, my friend and I stumbled upon a televised tournament final between Parker Bohn III and Walter Ray Williams Jr., who are (apparently) two of the great bowlers of our day. Williams led until the ninth frame when Bohn caught up with him, leading to a tied final frame and then a sudden death showdown that Williams won on the second bowl. And surprisingly, it was exciting. Bowling can be incredibly fun—especially if you’re in the right state of mind.
So what sort of bowling options are available to the average Georgetown student? There is no University bowling team, although there is a local interscholastic league in which a Georgetown team could participate. Howard University, for example, has both a men’s and women’s squad. I think someone should organize a program for Georgetown—maybe we could convert one floor of the new business school into a sweet facility. In the meantime, there’s Lucky Strike Lanes just a short cab ride away at 701 7th Street, NW. Lucky Strike is open weekdays until midnight and weekends until 2 a.m. and is a great Friday night alternative to hanging out in your friend’s sweaty Henle or scamming your way into a bar. “But Lynne at Chaddies loves me!” you say. No, she does not, and if there’s a Metro car across the street, she will feel no qualms about suddenly finding your fake ID objectionable after letting you in with no problem for over a year. The crowd at Lucky Strike is an interesting mix, and by interesting I mean that wearing motorcycle club colors is expressly prohibited on the Lanes’ website.
Still not convinced? Let me say this: chicks dig bowlers. For real. Remember back in middle school when your mom would drop you and a girl off at the bowling alley and you would play a few awkward frames before heading to the bathroom to play tonsil hockey? Still works. So next time your lady friend asks why you haven’t taken her out to dinner in a while, ditch her and head downtown. You’ll have the last laugh when you wake up next to a thirty-something cougar named Darlene.
Go a few frames with Jeff at jgb39@georgetown.edu.
