Whiskey Business: Typing under the influence

We all know how it feels. You’re sitting down in front of your computer, about to start on the 15-page paper you have due in three days, when all of sudden you remember that there’s still half a bottle of whiskey in your freezer. Suddenly, you find yourself wrestling with the ultimate collegiate dilemma: to drink or not to drink?
The reasons to make yourself a late-night pick-me-up are initially compelling. “It’s college,” you think. “This is the kind of person you’re supposed to be during college.” Equally compelling (and unsubstantiated) are the popular rationalizations “That wine’s not going to drink itself any time soon,” “I could use the room in my freezer anyway,” or “It’s just one drink, I’ll barely even feel it.”
Of all of these (or any other arguments your school-fried brain may shoot out) the last one might be the most compelling. For the seasoned drinker, one drink really wouldn’t do too much. But for those of us who are not on top of our game – or those of us who just don’t have the heart to stop at one drink – writing a paper with a glass in hand can turn a tedious process into something a little bit more adventurous. After all, it’s hard to be in a bad mood when you’re drinking.
As most people know, alcohol can often cause words to tumble out of the brain unexpectedly and with less thought than usual. While this can be a problem, it can also be an unexpected boon for papers.
The surge of creativity and outpouring of uninhibited thoughts can sometimes be exactly what you need to get over the daunting hurdle of a first draft and makes the thought of facing an empty white Word document a lot less painful. Alcohol inspires a certain level of confidence, which may help compensate for writer’s block. Furthermore, a drink makes a great companion and generally sounds like a slightly better alternative to spending the night alone with your books.
Alcohol and writers have always been connected, so looking to the great literary works for inspiration may also lead to the glass. From the creative to the more serious literary pursuits, classic authors have credited at least some portion of their creative process. Hunter S. Thompson’s affinity for Wild Turkey bourbon made it into Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas; Dorothy Parker had a literary love affair with the martini.  And Jean-Paul Sartre and Charles Bukowski alike promoted drinking as a solution to writer’s block, to name just a few of the authors who could have made this list.
Of course, when writing about certain cultures, several great American authors have been heavily under the influence of that culture’s liquor of choice. It is hard to imagine Faulkner’s descriptive narrative of the deep South would have been as fulfilling if he had not been drinking substantial amounts of whiskey and bourbon, and F. Scott Fitzgerald has credited the success of his accounts of New York’s Roaring Twenties to the copious Gin Rickeys he was consuming at the time.
Still, writers must proceed with caution.  A few drinks may seem like a great way to revitalize a tired brain, but too many will knock it out completely. Overimbibe and the words may bleed out faster than you can check them for errors.
So if your body is telling you that drinking while thinking is exactly what it needs, go for it – just be careful. While a few drinks may make it easier to process thoughts, too many will almost certainly cause more trouble than they’re worth. And just to be on the safe side, follow the advice of Ernest Hemmingway (who swore by his mojitos): Write drunk, edit sober. And maybe leave the heavy drinking to the professionals.