Athletes at Georgetown seem to have it all: access to a prestigious academic institution, D1 dreams-turned-realities, and a plethora of articles highlighting their achievements from campus publications. But while they may make threes on the court, shooting their shot in the dating world is not always as successful.
The Voice asked seven athletes about their relationships and the obstacles of dating while playing a university sport. Some athletes have chosen to be anonymous so they can speak more freely about their challenges and experiences in the dating scene.
When asked if they have been searching for love on campus, many pointed out that being in a relationship doesn’t exactly fit in with the demanding life of a student athlete.
“It’s definitely more complicated with dating—there’s so many requirements,” a football player said in an interview with the Voice. “There’s things you have to do to make sure that both people in the relationship are happy and with college athletics, you’re so time-constrained, with the actual athletic part, with the school, it’s very hard to balance those two things—let alone add in the third dynamic of a relationship.”
For athletes looking for love, the football player said it’s necessary to give up something for the relationship to work.
“I think to adequately have a good relationship, one thing has to sacrifice,” the football player said. “In my case, football, your academics, or the relationship. It’s very hard to manage all three.”
Being a student athlete requires demanding hours dedicated to one’s sport. That alone can make it hard to reserve time for another person.
“First and foremost, you don’t have a lot of time. You are constantly doing things for your sport and, most of the time, at weird hours that don’t allow for you to have much time for yourself, let alone another person,” a women’s soccer player wrote in a direct message to the Voice.
Depending on whether an athlete is in or out of season, their schedule will look different. While being out of season gives them more time, when an athlete is in season, their entire day is filled with sport-related responsibilities.
“In season, it’s tough: you’re leaving every weekend, more or less. Half the weekends [of] your fall semester you have to leave for two days, and then during the week, it’s early mornings. You have to wake up about six in the morning, get ready for practice, meetings, lifts. You’re normally done around noon and then you have class,” the football player said.
Student athletes have to fulfill more than just athletic requirements. Being students, they also have to find time to study and do homework, which can leave them little time to do anything else.
“From 9 a.m. to 6 p.m. I am doing things that I can’t get out of, and then after that I have ‘me time,’ but ‘me time’ I have to eat and then do my work. And by the time I’m done with all of that, it’s probably 9 or 10 p.m., if not later, because I’m probably gonna need a little bit of [time] in between after practice because I’m not like a robot. I need to exhale after my whole day,” Maria Filippova (CAS ’27), a volleyball player said.
One athlete mentioned that as a student athlete, the only time you may be able to see your partner is at night.
“When you meet someone only at night, it’s a little bit different and I guess the [relationship] expectations are a little different. And sometimes I don’t personally like the expectations that come with that,” a women’s track and field athlete said.
With this limited time and the numerous hours of practice daily, it’s almost expected that athletes would only hang out with people in their sport. Other than affecting their ability to date someone, it also impacts their friendships.
“It’s hard to sustain friendships, honestly, that aren’t on your team,” Filippova told the Voice. “I have a best friend who goes to UMD and I don’t even really get to call her. And that’s basically my sister.”
Sho Garcia (CAS ’28), a baseball player, stated that he felt close to his teammates because he doesn’t get time to meet many new people. However, he disagreed with the idea that athletes only hang around other athletes.
“It’s pretty tough honestly. We really don’t get that much time to go out and meet new people,” Garcia said. “I feel like there’s a pretty big stigma around how athletes don’t hang around non-athletes. I think that’s completely untrue.”
Student athletes did not only call out perceptions about friendships, though. The women’s track and field athlete believes that non-athletes glorify the idea of being with or “bagging” an athlete.
“People who aren’t athletes think very differently about people who are athletes in that sense,” she said. “When it comes to talking to people or relationships, there’s a lot of stereotyping that goes around, not only physically but also personality-wise and what they think they gain from talking to or being with an athlete.”
Despite those negative perceptions, some athletes still search for love, but have unfortunately had no luck.
“Respectfully, all of the past guys that I’ve been in communication with in that sense were, as much as they want to act like they’re serious and they’re in it for the long run, they literally never are, and it’s pretty easy to figure out in a couple of months,” Filippova said.
When asked if dating a college athlete would be easier than dating a non-athlete, most athletes absolutely agreed that it would be.
“It’s a lot more relatable because we know how hard it is on each other,” Garcia said. “If we have the time, then we would definitely be able to meet new people and try and find someone that we really enjoy being around. But, it really depends on time and how much we have.”
These athletes emphasized the common ground found within an athlete pair: tough schedules, sport struggles, and living an uncommon college experience.
“This is definitely very common and happens a lot because when you date another college athlete, you both understand the lifestyle that you have chosen, and it is much easier to explain hardships and time management with someone who understands you. Arguments are a bit easier to convey and you both have the ability to relate to each other on some of these hardships,” the women’s soccer player wrote.
However, Filippova doesn’t think that dating another college athlete is as good as it is made out to be. Although she acknowledged that they would probably understand what she is experiencing, seeing each other would still be a big challenge.
“If he’s not a fall sport, for example, let’s say it’s basketball or lacrosse in the winter or spring, our schedules might not exactly align, but that almost makes it worse because then he’s gonna be busy at a different time than I’m busy,” Filippova said.
Dating non-athletes comes with its own struggles.
“I’ve tried to talk to non-athletes as well. It’s definitely easier in the sense of like, he actually has time to speak to me, so that’s really cool. However, I feel bad when there are certain obligations that I have that take my time away,” Filippova said. “So that adds a strain on the relationship. So, I feel like either way, not to be a pessimist, but it’s almost a lose-lose, whoever you pick.”
Despite these numerous hardships, some Georgetown athletes have managed to find love on the Hilltop. A men’s lacrosse player, who is dating another college athlete, believes that communication is made easier because they are both athletes.
“I think dating a student athlete, in general, we know each other’s deal pretty much, so it’s like, I know she won’t be on the phone for that long. I know I can’t expect a response until like 4 o’clock or 5 o’clock. And I think we have a lot more leniency towards being off your phone,” he told the Voice.
Though not dating another college athlete, Hashem Asadallah (CAS ’27), a men’s basketball player, has found his experience with his partner works because of their understanding of his commitments.
“My communication during those hours isn’t the best because I’m usually so busy. I mean that does sometimes cause conflict, but if you have an understanding partner, it makes it easier,” Asadallah said.
Asadallah points out that although his partner is not a college athlete, they still have responsibilities outside the relationship as well.
“Just cause she’s not a student athlete, that doesn’t mean she doesn’t have commitments such as school, work, time to study. We try to make sure that our schedules align or we make time to see each other with all the stuff we have going on,” Asadallah said.
Regardless of the many challenges of dating as a college athlete, it’s not impossible to make it work. Some athletes have seen their teammates form great relationships despite having to manage being a student athlete.
“At Georgetown, there’s very few guys that are like, ‘I’m trying to go to the NFL.’ They’re playing football for the team, but really to enjoy it,” the football player said. “It’s not like there is that pressure of, ‘I need to be completely undistracted, I need to be at every single thing so that I can make it to the NFL.’ So, I think that in that situation, people were better able to have relationships.”
Ultimately, it’s up to the athlete.
“I think that it is manageable,” the football player said. “It’s very tough, but I think if I found somebody that I actually really saw a future with, then I would have sacrificed.”
