Playoffs!? Yes, we’re talking about playoffs. Not a game, not a game … not a game. Heck, we’re not even talking about practice, Allen Iverson. These are real Major League Baseball playoff games. They are here, and it’s time for me to make some predictions for this year’s playoffs. We’re going to have some fun with it, too.
First let’s look at the American League Division Series. The New York Yankees versus the Detroit Tigers poses an interesting match-up: a city of millions up against a city of animals. New York may be the most storied franchise in MLB and have the numbers behind it, but Detroit was undoubtedly the biggest surprise this season despite stumbling a bit at the end. This year Detroit racked up wins like Henry Ford pumped out Model T’s. We’ll see them honk their horns right by New York. In the other series we have the Oakland Athletics and the Minnesota Twins. Oakland and California in general are hot spots for movies, and the Twins starred in the solid flick Little Big League. I don’t know exactly how this relates to my pick, but I’m going to cheat and take Oakland in this one. Why? They’re up 2-0 after two games in Minnesota.
The National League will be interesting. With the St. Louis Cardinals and the San Diego Padres, we have a battle of the Saints. According to the hierarchy of the Catholic Church, Cardinals trump Padres. However, the edge here has to go to a city named in a foreign language. The New York Mets might seem to have the advantage over the Los Angeles Dodgers. Like the Yankees, the Mets have a city of millions behind them. However, we must quickly realize that the Dodgers used to be from Brooklyn. Last time I checked, two cities always beat one city.
In the League Championship Series, things get a bit tighter. This time I won’t pick Oakland. Why? Because they aren’t up 2-0 already and the Detroit pitching staff will hurl from the mound like Marshall Mathers spits lyrics. Los Angeles’ two city advantage can’t be beat, can it? It’s name is spelled in Spanish, taking away what won San Diego the Division Series in the first place. But hold up a second. San Diego isn’t just Spanish. It’s also German, according to a legendary news anchor I know. In this case, two foreign languages beat one foreign language. Sorry, Los Angeles fans. Brooklyn can’t save you this time around.
That leaves us with Detroit and San Diego in the World Series. It wouldn’t matter if you had both New Yorks, the Spaniards and the Germans invade Detroit all at the same time. This city is the pure definition of “ruff and tuff.” Welcome to the Jungle, because this year’s World Series Champion will be Detroit Rock City.
