Scorpio (Oct. 23 – Nov. 21)
By Joaquin Martinez
This October, Mercury is in Scorpio, meaning your thoughts will run deep and weigh on your conscience. In the wise words of FKA Twigs, “Where are the thinkers?” Well, Scorpios, the thinkers must be you this Halloween. Trust your gut. Those chills down your spine or those sudden goosebumps are not to be ignored! Many evil witches will try to cast malevolent spells on you, but if you follow your intuition, you will be able to spot the tricks from the treats. Try not to enter too deep into the dark labyrinths of your mind, however.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22 – Dec. 21)
By Ninabella Arlis
Mercury will move into Sagittarius on October 29, meaning you should watch your words. Communicating with others may be tricky, but it’s your self-talk that you should worry about. Mercury makes Sagittarius seek movement and transformation, but avoid trying to recreate your whole life with a new wardrobe or 6 a.m. yoga classes you’ll never go to. Think about what you truly want and go get it! Don’t let anyone hold you back, especially yourself. You can do anything you put your mind to this Halloweekend, whether that means creating the sexiest, most niche but also clearly recognizable costume ever, or resisting the urge to run away from your friends when you’re drunk. Channel your energy in a good direction—get out on the dance floor and shake it like no one is watching!
Capricorn (Dec. 22 – Jan. 21)
By Lucy Montalti
There are only so many times that one can supervise a drunken friend, and you, Capricorn, discovered that limit during last year’s cursed double Halloweekend. I know that the bloody, tequila-scented stress, coupled with the deep injustice of nobody recognizing your sexy Edgar Allan Poe costume, still festers in the depths of your soul. Nevertheless, we persist. This year, we’re doing affirmations. Hold my hands, and repeat after me: “My costume will be hot. My dancing will not be stiff. The night will bend to my will, and God-fucking-damn-it somebody WILL flirt with me.” Now take that icy heart of yours and play Dr. Frankenstein. Stitch it together. Jolt it awake. This is your year to be the problem… Your friends can hold the hair this time.
Aquarius (Jan. 22 – Feb. 20)
By Joaquin Martinez
As any Sex and the City fan would know, Carrie Bradshaw’s cheating era was quite messy, filled with incognito nightly trips to see Big and Marlboro Lights in the pouring rain. Aquarius, you might be dressing up as a sexy mouse or Elphaba this Halloween, but with Pluto’s transit through Aquarius this October, you’ll be spiritually embodying Carrie Bradshaw in some of her lowest moments (hopefully without the cheating era). If only you had a $400 pair of Manolo Blahniks to soothe the pain of your Mr. Big.
Pisces (Feb. 20 – March 20)
By Elizabeth Adler
Dear, sweet Pisces. I know it’s been stressful to balance writing your philosophy paper, crying because you miss trick-or-treating with your little brother, and planning your perfectly niche costume (don’t worry, no one else is going as Margot Tenenbaum). You deserve to have some fun on your favorite holiday. Let loose this Halloween, just not too loose. Remember, you aren’t experiencing God on the Vil A rooftop—that’s just the 5 White Claws you drank on an empty stomach (no, the Whisk latte you had this morning doesn’t count). Go grab some 90 Second Pizza and wind down before you start asking everyone if they hate you (they don’t).
Aries (March 21 – April 19)
By Imani Liburd
Aries, aries, aries… Get ready for a weekend filled with your favorite candy that the rest of us despise, like licorice or Tootsie Rolls, and one in which no one hands you a drink. As a certified know-it-all, you can get a little too loose sometimes and start speaking nonsense. This weekend, I want you to do us all a favor: calm down and focus on yourself. Take some time on your costume (because rarely is your first choice the best one), and have some genuine fun this weekend. I guess I can’t blame all your character flaws on you because, as your fellow Aries, Lady Gaga, said, you were “Born This Way.” So, for Halloweekend, get off your high horse, strut the streets of Georgetown, and party until you can’t anymore!
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
By Amber Bai
As the golden rays of sunshine grace the haunting ground, Taurus, this is your time to sparkle as the epitome of poise and serenity. Your creativity and leadership will shine, making you the head of the Halloween masquerade, the Mike Wheeler, the Fred Jones. You’ll guide your team through the eerie trials of the night, the army of ghosts swarming your doorstep, the demon Pazuzus whispering in the wind, and the October storm that will freeze your mind and soul. Beware, don’t try to be everywhere at once. We all know what you’re capable of, but don’t overexert yourself with trick-or-treating and midnight parties. Stay safe, enjoy the night, and let your light outshine the shadows lurking in the night.
Gemini (May 21 – June 21)
By Joaquin Martinez
Mercury, the Gemini ruling planet, is in retrograde for you this spooky season! As SZA once said, “Don’t take the bait!” Expect major changes to your priorities, valuables, and earthly possessions. Your mind will soon turn into a haunted house, and many ghouls will appear at your front door. You may hear unclear messages and eerie echoes from the spirit world, but remember: not every whisper requires a response! Secrets and haunting memories will resurface, but it’s all part of Mercury stirring the celestial cauldron. Unfortunately, you will encounter more tricks than treats this Halloween, but ultimately, you hold the key to your own spellbook. Don’t let any trolls ruin your night!
Cancer (June 22 – July 22)
By Alexandra Risi
Cancers, gear up for a weekend of fun, madness, and questionable decision-making. The moon is in Pisces, which means that you’ll feel supported and emotionally in touch this Halloweekend. I know that curling up with bags of gummy bears and watching the scariest movie you can find (Coraline) sounds like your ideal October night, but we need to have some fun! I want to see your most reckless decisions, without any of that drunk sobbing you might see after a night at Wilson’s. As your theatrical side starts to show, let’s see the most creative costumes you can find. Dress up as Zendaya Hat Theory, an Italian brainrot character, or even the TSITP mirror-glazed chocolate cake with raspberry coulis. No matter what, keep it uniquely you. While the stars might not always align for you, this weekend is a chance to let loose, so take advantage of it!
Leo (July 23 – Aug. 22)
By Phoebe Nash
Leo, my Leo. Given this isn’t your peak astrological season, consider your fellow lioness: Barack Obama. You’ll have to hear me out on this one: lean into your cunning charisma when choosing your costume. Pick a character that demands a vaguely political handshake on the sticky floors of whatever event you spent way too much money buying tickets for. Think Robert F. Kennedy Jr. spotted at Compass Coffee, Sen. John Fetterman (D-Pen.) flipping burgers with GUGS, or that one GUSA poster that looked like an advertisement for jeans. Or, be a bit more meta this season. Be the love triangle in The Summer I Turned Pretty, day 31 of this endless government shutdown, or the space the Wicked characters were holding so long ago. All in all, I hope your look makes as little sense as your choice of underdressed pledge to go home with. ’Tis the damn season.
Virgo (Aug. 23 – Sept. 22)
By Aubrey Butterfield
Oh, Virgo. You’ll have more to watch out for than black cats and randomly-placed ladders this Halloweekend. Your biggest fright this Halloweekend won’t be your econ midterm results, or your ex texting “u up?” at 2:46 a.m. on a Tuesday, but something truly scary: yourself. We’re not saying avoid mirrors (though you should probably dodge the broken ones), or that you shouldn’t go through with that sexy Rep. Mitch McConnell (R-Ken.) costume (well, maybe we are saying that), but you should be wary of your drunken words. Halloweekend might not be the best time to bring up your crush on your RA or how you purposefully avoid cleaning the toilet to watch your evil suitemate suffer. Emotions are high and tempers are short, and the last thing you want is that fake blood on your lip to become real when the guy in the inflatable dinosaur costume has had enough of your shit. Best of luck, and consider skipping the neon-green mystery punch.
Libra (Sept. 23 – Oct. 22)
By Alexandra Risi
Oh, Libra, don’t feel so down! The sun may have just moved out of your sign, but that means it’s time to soak up some time out of the spotlight. Take a much-needed spooky spa day, complete with buckets of candy and your favorite scary movie. As for the night, being off the main stage means you can have the messiest Halloween you’d like. While it’s not exactly encouraged (for the next morning’s sake), if you want to down a couple of shots of witch’s brew and text all of the people who ghosted you, we won’t complain. Just make sure that once the sun rises, you’ve turned back into your human form—not the she-wolf you were the night before.
